July. Almost out the door.
FRIDAY FIVE!
1. 2-year-olds are awesome.
2. I work with cool people.
3. I really like our house!
4. I REALLY like the pool (nb: not ours, a local one I go to in summer)
5. I LOVE SUMMER!
Alright well…sorry gotta eat yogurt then bounce.
Well well well. What have we here. An update?!
But seriously. It is now the 6th of July and I am back at work. I was extremely crabby about it this morning, as I am after any long, amazing weekend, but as usual as the day went on…it wore off. I have a good job.
As Jeff said, “this was my favorite Fourth of July EVER!” and it was. THE RUNDOWN, loosely, edited for INTERNET PRIVACY CONCERNS:
THURSDAY we started it off right with dinner out (Toddler at her grandma’s), at Ginger Hop. Excellent food, service and drink. Even better company. We were happy as clams and went home to Hang Out.
FRIDAY I got up and intended to go to work…then didn’t. HA! Took the day off instead!!! Jeff worked out, I took a looooong bike ride (super-mini-Grand-Rounds) which was gorgeous and I was FAST (but suuuuuper tired out whew!), then we met up again at home. Then off to get smoothies EXCEPT! Jeff saw Black Sheep on Eat Street and we went THERE instead. YEAH!!! A wonderful table at the open window/wall on the street. Beer iced tea and pizza. A most excellent lunch date! We then tooled around and did some shopping, up in the Roseville ‘hood. THEN I met Diana at Sandcastle!!! We had wonderful beachside food and decided we were not dumb, but other people were. Among other things. LOL. Home and more hanging out. YAY! Grilled cheese. G&Ts. etc. Wonderful.
SATURDAY we slept in, then Toddler was returned to us….biiiiiiig hugs and HOORAY!!! HOORAY! We played and played, then loaded up the bike/trailer with Toddler, snacks, etc. Off to the splashpad/playground!! It was glorious. The water was icy but Toddler couldn’t get enough. Lots of ‘jumping’. Awwwww.
We finally packed up and headed home for a quick lunch followed by Jeff doing yardwork/me napping/Toddler napping, followed by special trip to Target for Jeff/Toddler for ‘cake? cake?’ and me working out a bit, and then….setting up the yard for SUPER FUN TIMES ahead. I was really excited. I got it set up just so, the sprinkler, the wading pool, the refreshments, the water toys, etc. It was like a wonderful little party…for 3.
My family came home and we got to hangin’. We just played played played outside and Jeff grilled and we all ate good food. “Is it nummy?” Haha. Contentment. Happiness. Silliness. Joy. Soon it was nearing 9pm so it was time to go in. Showers and books and bed for Toddler, then I went out to find myself some fireworks. Put lights on the bike and SCORE! Saw some as I biked up the Bloomington Ave hill. Amazing moment. Saw more at the big park, too. Glittery gorgeousness. I love it. Home for Oreo pie and book reading and sleep. A GREAT GREAT DAY!!!
SUNDAY a split day, included: pool time, cooking, making cards/watching old GoT, more pool time and lots of being silly, minestrone, and reading a NEW book. Probably more than that but I don’t want to detail. ANYWAY.
Anyway that’s what was up…the best Fourth. Only made by skipping out on other stuff, alas, but, that’s JOMO for you…it was just what we needed. Happy 4th!
(Back in the day: 2012 2011 (bonus!2!) 2006 2003 2002 2000 1999 (seizure warning))
Anyway. It’s gonna be May, wait, it IS. Happy May Day. A couple of thoughts:
1. Toddler is on the verge of understanding that the crib is not inescapable. She seems to know there is a way out. If she just lines things up correctly, the world is hers, and it will be a gamechanger.
I can respect that, as a 33-year-old adult, for sure.
2. Gymnastics. Again. There has been the question lately of if something is worth going for just because you want it, and if the wanting is just because the thing is there. OK, that makes no sense. Anyway. I am likening this to when I wanted to be on the gymnastics TEAM. I honestly don’t think my intentions were all that ‘good’ or pure (even for a 9-year-old). I saw the blue floor on the other side of the building, and knew people over there were ‘special’ and that I’d have to be designated as ‘special’ in order to get over there. And so I decided that I must have that. I mean, I liked gymnastics, don’t get me wrong, but…well I guess I also wanted to compete, show off, etc. Anyway. That is not the point. The point is, that wound up being one of my most favorite paths in life, which I took just because it was there. Or something.
Some thoughts for today. LEVEL UP (but how?! or why). I hope you all have glorious weekends!
“I am confident that nobody… will accuse me of selfishness if I ask to spend time, while I am still in good health, with my family, my friends and also with myself.”
—Nelson Mandela
“Let everything happen to you / beauty and terror / just keep going / no feeling is final”
—Rainer Maria Rilke
“From there to here, from here to there, funny things are everywhere”
—Dr. Seuss
“It’s like a cab, except you might get stabbed.” -me / “You might get TOBY!” -Jenni
—4/16/15
7 years ago today…HAMJAM08 prep
6 years ago today…HAMJAM09 craziness/little circle uprising
5 years ago today…freelance+coldpress followed by bike ride
4 years ago today…watching Rachel play volleyball followed by freelance/bike ride
3 years ago today…prepping for bubbly bridal brunch for Jenny!
2 years ago today…fairly pregnant
1 year ago today…putting the house on the market
^ Thank you Face Book for this summary, I do like that new feature of yours
Anyway. What’s up. We are now more than halfway through April, I’ve been meaning to come here and say “YAY MARCH IS OVER” for awhile now but hey, WCYD? Last weekend we finally had what is basically our first ‘normal’ day in over two months and it was glorious. I haven’t minded the abnormal, I’m willing and even eager to do what I must to get us through a trying period of threatened health, but it’s even more gratifying to have the household in good enough health that it isn’t even a blip on the radar. THAT my friends is good fortune.
I can’t remember what I went into previously, without going into too much privacy-compromising detail we have had a very intense year that started at the end of January with some scary health news for one member of the household, February which was dealing with said news and March which was recovery. So, yeah. We are EXTREMELY lucky because all went well and all is well now, just gotta stay there and enjoy life in the meantime, in any way we can.
WAYS WE HAVE BEEN DOING SO:
-family bike rides!!!!!! with my NEW BIKE thanks JEFF, and the bike trailer, also attempts at the tricycle with the Toddler. YEAH!!! This is just the best thing.
-Playing and Hanging Out. HANGING OUT! Our favorite thing, for real.
-Going out to dinner/simplifying life/worrying less about saving $ because who knows what The Future may hold…live in the Now if possible
-Being OUTSIDE!!! thank you April!
-Spending time with only the best and most beloved of our friends and family, otherwise just us
-Doing our jobs and enjoying them, but just enough (MASSIVE S/O to Jeff’s thoughtful + amazing coworkers BTW)
-Doing what makes us happy (“Do what makes you happy” -Andrea)
Etc.
Et cetera.
ET CETERA!!!
I don’t have a lot more to say here. We had a great Easter which was the three of us doing an in-home egg hunt followed by quiche followed by nap(?) followed by indoor playground GOOD TIMES PARK followed by a wonderful evening out at SMASHBURGER where everyone charmed everyone. Last weekend was also solidly perfect (also good TV returned). So! I intended to do EOTD/EOTWs, but time escaped me and you get this.
This weekend I am off to my cousin Lisa’s wedding. It should be decent, but kind of weird because no kids. That will be the last family wedding for quite some time too, bummer man.
That is all. Happy Abril/Avril/April.
Reasons I am crabby:
1. Not very much sun lately. Not enough outside time!
2. Laziness in taking care of myself properly
3. Anxiety over work changes ahead
4. March Madness is defunct since my bracket is a complete sh*tshow, so less joy in March in general, ha
5. No room for yoga right now
6. I’ve been a real jerk this month and feel guilty about it
7. Conflict over spending money to enjoy the now vs. saving for the future
8. The Daily Grind
9. Mice and fear of mice
10. Uncertainty and complexity of the health of my family
11. I keep forgetting people’s birthdays which is very unlike me
12. Not enough time
13. Busy weeks/traveling ahead
14. Not good at keeping my mouth shut and angsting over that (what’s Done is Done, though)(see: #6)
15. I have an excess of $, things and comforts in my life while many have none and I do nothing to help that
16. Using my phone too much, for no good reason.
17. Wasting goddamned time on the internet, overall feeling unproductive in life
18. Messiness
19. Clothes + having too many + not making good use of them
WAYS TO REMEDY THIS:
1. Follow my manifesto aka SELF CARE FIRST! = eat when hungry, meditate, move, etc.
2. PUT DOWN the phone and avoid time-wasting internet activities. I did a great job of this on Sunday and it was great. More complex than that but one step at a time.
3. Pursue intentional (gag) basement workouts instead of ones peppered with TV (?) and/or more walks outside and/or SOON bike rides
4. Try to keep my cards closer to the vest or chest or whatever it is
5. Exercise more compassion and People Are People (see: Manifesto)
6. Take joy in each movement of each day
7. Listen to more music while working (= makes me more productive)
8. Get off the internet
9. Make fewer lists / but make more lists and stick to it
10. Go easier on myself.
11. ***MEDITATE!***
12. Go through my wardrobe + purge/clean up
13. Clean out cars
14. write down birthdays
ETA 15. clean up desk at work
I actually do NOT feel better after writing that but oh well.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAKAN!!!
I have a question for you all, and it is this:
What THE F*CK HAPPENED to this BLOG?!??!?!?!
JK, I know, obviously, which is the intersection of laziness/lack thereof/privacy concerns that I’ve mentioned. BUT I’d really like to not let this blog die?! I mean it is legacy, folks. LEGACY.
When I last blogged it was “the year of Alexis”. Now it’s just kind of a regular year, I think. WHICH IS FINE…b/c a whoooooole lot of other shit has happened that I won’t even get into here.
Suffice it to say it is good I was so thankful for the luck of 2014 because it so far has not really continued into 2015, except in weirdly dark ways. (Think “at least it’s not SO bad…”)
However as of this writing the household is (mostly) healthy, well-rested, and ready for spring which appears to be appearing (slowly but surely). So that’s TRULY something for which to be grateful.
Toddler is Amazing and as she grows older she’s even cooler. IF THAT IS POSSIBLE.
Went to Chicago with Toddler to see Jenny and Nephew2 and it was an absolute blast! Loved having a weekend away with my little girl.
Now you get A LIST.
A LIST OF THINGS THAT ARE *IN*:
-The TV show ‘Veep’
-Oreos
-Blizzards b/c DQ opened early this year (whatup!)
-Ignoring voicemail
-Postponing jury duty
-Basketball
-Getting results via berating in public
-Blankets
-TUSK
A LIST OF THINGS THAT ARE *OUT*:
-regular TV
-voicemail
-idiots
MAYBE there will be more blogging. MAYBE.
“2015 is the Year of Alexis!”
—my boss’s boss, last week
“Here he comes, he can rock / He can break dance and he can pop / He can rap, he can act / and if it comes down to it, he can scrap / Hey there… here comes Big Will again”
—Will Smith…oh yeah!
It’s so JAN U AR Y out there…of past and present. Not the usual slog but something stranger. More like the days of YOUTH, of Season and struggles and being on-on-on. I’m ON.
What?!
Anyway. I had a really awesome day yesterday, I wish I could do an EOTD about it, but it was very work-related, instead you get this: 1. Met a great INTERNET FRIEND who turned out to be just as wonderful IRL, also we had egg creams/cheesecake 2. Found a Nintendo store and got Jeff a great present! 3. NAILED IT at big work event that was truly ‘trial by fire’ 4. Cool innovative dinner alone post-event 5. 1YO kissed my screen-face on FaceTime.
YEAH!
Work. Work Work. What’s the plan?
A New Swan Queen?
The truth is I Don’t Know. I feel very “you-are-ze-next-one” in terms of Bela Karolyi etc. except there are many complicated things about that. That I cannot go into here. But…it’s on my mind. And it’s a really interesting time right now. I feel very confident. If overwhelmed.
It’s GOOD!
1YO is the best baby ever. Can’t. Get. ENOUGH!
I went to a Level 9 meet on Saturday (and then the UMN meet after, w/ 1YO – YES JANUARY with its LIVE GYMNASTICS!). My friend Tom’s niece was competing. It was pretty great to watch a JO meet again, though not as intoxicating as it was even a couple years ago…but still. Cool. I loved that complicated, intense time.
This feels a little like that time.
+ I’m ready. GO!
“You can do anything that you want to do / with your mind body and soul / do it, prove it to yourself and say / I want (I want) / I will (I will) / I can do anything / It’s a difficult world and you have got to prove / that you’re ready and you can do it / Nothing in this world would stop you / I know I can I will fulfill my dreams!”
—Joy Livin’
“1. Self care first!
2. Practice no hurry
3. People are people
4. Stay in the moment
5. It is an honor and a privilege”
—me
“I want you to cut me a—f@#$%!!!!”
— Jeff, 12/31/14, tripping on a plastic bucket of toys in the kitchen
46 minutes to get this entry done and posted! Looks like charity, cheese and chess will have to wait. EOY must go on. ETC! While Jeff plays in the Shadow of Mordor…
ANYWAY! 2014, wow. This will have to be a short entry. It will also be a VERY DIFFERENT entry from my 2013 one. So much joy this year and so much luck.
Here are the 2014 themes:
SELF-IMPROVEMENT
TODDLERs are COOL (esp mine)
HEALTH (= GOOD)
IN SUM:
-everyone healthy. Healthy, healthy, healthy. Including my Dad. We are SO. SO. LUCKY.
-baby is a toddler and toddlers are GREAT!! LOVE!
-finally finding my Groove in Life as a worker/mom/wife/friend/etc. YESSSSSSS.
-getting better at marriage and everything post-baby, always room for improvement but I try
-NEW HOUSE. Moved away from psycho (most important part) and into a DREAM HOUSE. Now that we are settled I am so, so happy. What a GREAT use of our $$$! I seriously love this place.
-work: great. Super great. Moments of distress/stress but finished a major project AND got to go to a sweet leadership conference AND got to lead and hang with really awesome coworkers both old and new. Hitting my stride man.
-trips: Chicago 3x, NC with Jeff, SF once, and I think somewhere else but honestly I can’t remember. Oh yeah I went to St. Louis in May. Also Fargo in April, heh. All good.
-great family, as always. So happy to see everyone all the times I did…showers, get togethers, Halloween (cousins!!! YEAH, so fun), Thanksgiving. Etc. What a cool group. I should see them more…
-good friends, old and new. In a mom/baby group that I absolutely adore, I am quite lucky. Plus still get to have my dear and best old-gold friends, too. YEAH.
-dear old friends getting married (not to each other!) – Diana and Dave. SO happy to see them and their dear spouses wed.
We just (ok, 2+ hours ago….but still) got back from a most amazing NYE evening at my friend Sara’s house. It was just perfectly delightful and everything I could have dreamed of for my social life at 33…seriously! She had the moms group moms/babies/dads over to her lakeside abode for outstanding food, tons of laughs, comfortable conversation and toddler chasing (each other/us/them/etc). The kids were soooooooo sweet together and we all enjoyed each others’ company immensely. I have no idea how I got so lucky to sneak into this group of friends but I’ll take it. I keep waiting for them to find out how uncool I am but still I am ‘in’ ;). YEAH! haha.
I have a couple resolutions for 2015. 1. Not make anymore enemies…ok JK JK JK! But:
1. Be more conscious of phone use
2. Go to open gym 3x (or more, but, aim high etc)
Also to live out my manifesto I’ve been developing, seen above:
1. Self care first!
2. Practice no hurry
3. People are people
4. Stay in the moment
5. It is an honor and a privilege
^ I’ve been developing this over the latter half of the year. There was a little more room for self-reflection and self-improvement then (see: baby vs toddler) and I also was presented with opportunities to get in tune with that stuff, too (see: work leadership conference). I know I CAN be a better person and I owe it to myself/the world to try. So over time I’ve put these principles together, in my head. I should write them down. Well, I just did. So there. But. I don’t come close to living like this even 50% of the time, but may as well try. KEEP IMPROVING! That’s my 2015 goal I think. Right?
Oh yeah also:
3. Continue to attempt to get 7 servings of produce (fruit or veggie) a day. This shouldn’t be hard, and yet…
Lots to be thankful for in 2014. Security, family, love, health. Unbelievable goodness. And near mania but still. Good. 2014 was so busy. But so good. We are so very lucky. I just look back on 2014 and see a lot of growth and movement and hope. As usual these things come in streaks so having two good years back-to-back usually means…things take a turn for the less-good, soon. I am hoping 2015 is quiet and good to me, I see a lot of good ahead, but you just never know…
But for now I’m sticking with it. Here’s to a great 2014, and a superb 2015, I hope! HAPPY NEW YEAR!
“It’s been a hard day’s night! / And I’ve been working like a dog! / It’s been a hard day’s night! / I should be sleeping like a log”
—Beatles
“I have a quote for you. How about ‘killer boots, man’?”
—Jeff, 12/24/14…no.
“The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.”
—Burton Hillis / aka William E. Vaughan
“Noel! Noel! Noel! Noel!”
time 11:04 pm feeling GREAT!!! wearing Christmas PJs ready for treats and bed, probably in that order next treats?
(17! Yo. 17 yrs of this update, that is.)
OK I give up on the quote. So…I am sitting BY THE FIRE in our NEW HOUSE, by the TREE, listening to Xmas music while Jeff plays his videogame and it is AWESOME!!! Let me just say…
it was pretty cool being pregnant at Christmas…
and it was pretty wonderful having a baby at Christmas…
but it is AWESOME having a toddler at Christmas!!!
Our little gal is just the absolute light of our lives right now. Not that she wasn’t, but, wow, what a Real Person she is, and what amazingness that is. YEAH!!!
Basically I just had the Best Day Ever. And so it deserves…
EOTD (edited for privacy, as usualllll).
6:30am. Woke up. 7am. Woke up for real. Finally getting light out, sort of. Had some things to do for work quick so fired up the laptop while I made some extreeeeeemely strong coffee and did some sun salutations. NOTE TO SELF: my body and mind feel 100x better doing even just 2-3 sun salutations in the AM. Something about it just makes the body feel good. Must continue! Anyway. Got coffee, cookie, banana and vitamins and set up on the couch by the Christmas lights to do work. Work. Irritating to have to do but I am feeling very good about my job. And therefore very lucky. And it was quick. Anyway. Heard 1YO but continued working, eventually Jeff got to it and I got my work done. SCORE.
We all got dressed and had snacks and put on shoes and headed out. Jeff forced me to pick where to go and I picked Sunstreet Breads despite it being superbusyallthetime. There was a Safety Bruegger’s across the street, after all. BUT! Got to Sunstreet and not only was the line short, there were tables!!! A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE. I have wanted to go there as a family for approximately the entire time 1YO has been alive. Got biscuits, potato balls, a Downtowner for Jeff(!!!), fresh-squeezed OJ, a loaf of bread for later, and the most amazing fruit bowl ever (because of its amazing orange – seriously we all fought over it by the end). We were all very pleased and satisfied and also enjoyed the people watching. A most EXCELLENT breakfast, possibly EVER!
Then! Off to GOOD TIMES PARK. God I cannot CANNOT get ENOUGH of that place!!! It was an absolute blast as always. Nothing terribly notable, just a, well, GOOD TIME for all! My favorite MN winter destination. Lots of hopscotch number jumping, yeah. On the way home stopped at the videogame store for Jeff’s Christmas game and a couple stocking stuffers (Zelda puzzles). We were SET! Also for cheap gas. AMERIKA!
Home, I got to making cinnamon roll dough and the other two got to lunch followed by a small meltdown followed by Mommy getting to rock her baby and sing Silent Night for awhile, then nap. Nap began and I was going to ride my bike (warm and melted snow!), HOWEVER it was 1. hanging from the ceiling 2. I instead got caught in a cleaning FRENZY OMG. I went absolutely crazy on the kitchen and cleaned out the entire fridge INCLUDING wiped it down I have no idea what happened. Except. It was sorely, SORELY needed. Hooray. I also cleaned up the playroom and dining room for the first time in 2 weeks (it’s been a crazy couple of weeks). Lookin’ good! Yeah!
This cleaning crusade left much less time for moi, including finishing roll dough, finishing making 1YO’s blankie (C-mas gift), and working out. I gave up on the other two things and instead got to work on the blankie. Very very messy outcome but I still call it a SUCCESS because I am very proud of the end result, since it was fun to make and looks cool, if messy! I hope she likes it. If she does not…I’ll use it. Ha ha ha. A very fun way to spend the afternoon – somehow it is oh-so-satisfying to see a little project like that come together, even at 33, I like to be able to say to myself, “I made that” (like, a website! or a blanket). Yeah!
Took a long (6 minutes instead of 4 minutes, F-Y-I) shower with lavender soap and 1YO woke up. Unhappy. Needed a cuddle! Which I gladly gave. Got dressed in sparkly gold shirt and she put on (OK I put it on) her Christmas dress which was my dress as an infant. NICE. Totally adorable. The MN grandparents began to arrive, bearing gifts and food. We started a fire in the WONDERFUL new FIREPLACE and sat around drinking wine and eating cookies and chatting. Got the dinner started and got to opening gifts. 1YO caught on very quickly and soon was in heaven distributing, opening, and playing with said gifts. It was a little Christmas miracle to watch her happiness in action! So much attention and love for one person. It’s great.
Sat down to eat dinner, which was wonderful, then passed the rest of the evening talking, laughing, eating treats, feeding 1YO treats (she is a cookie monster), playing with toys, etc. Cleanup was easy and speedy and 1YO stayed up late being happy and cute. YEAH.
I then finished up the dough, did some dishes, trolled Facebook and the like, and now am writing this update. We have had an absolutely crazy last two weeks with big work projects and lack of childcare and let me just say we totally kicked ass and it makes this holiday/break time even more sweet. As if it could get sweeter?! This year has been ridiculously good to me, and I’m just going with it. Tonight was simply awesome and tomorrow will be great too. It’s our first Christmas spent at home just the three of us and I cannot wait!!! So weird and wonderful to build our families and grow into our own lives. I miss my sisters very much, and my parents, though luckily I’ll see my parents in a few days, but I’m also proud and glad to have created the life we have. We are truly outrageously, criminally lucky. And so many people aren’t. So I try to remember to be grateful.
But right now I’m just so, so, so happy. So happy. One of my very happiest moments, just being here, in our home, with my husband, in our life, with our healthy(healthy!) family and friends. What a wonderful year. Merry Christmas!!!
ETA: I found a quote!