October 22nd, 2009
When I Grow Up 2009
…I wanna be famous…
…I’ll be stable…
…There’s a lot I want to do…
Oh, and ‘Grow up sounds like throw up’? Who said that? Recently?
…
As usual, my cousin Trike’s life and thinking and whatever you call it follows (leads? yes) my own. He writes it better than I can, and writes what I’m thinking before I even realize I’m thinking it. Creepy. And useful. And eye opening. Trike is my Fake Internet Therapist, and he doesn’t even know it.
From his blog:
“You know what I realized just moments ago? You see I was sitting around painting kabuki masks and listening to Fiery Furnaces, and I ask myself ‘What have I learned this year? What was the point of this year?’ Nothing was really coming to me, but then it hit me….I learned that THIS is what life is. Up until now I’ve spent a long time waiting for life to reveal its secrets to me and to experience the completeness and reality of adulthood. This is it. There’s no fucking red ribbon to cut with a golden scissors. There’s no sudden transfer of knowledge and understanding from the heavens to my brain. There’s no security or certainty. This is just it.
…[*note: there’s more, but I don’t want to steal it all]…
The short version is this:
The life I’m living currently is my adult life. There’s no more initiation I have to pass to become an adult. The only way may life is going to change at this point is going to be if I make a choice to change it, or if it’s changed by the hand of fate. There’s no more simple track that I’m on where I will naturally progress at regular intervals. One could argue that this has been the case since I graduated, but this year I really feel like it’s for sure.”
No fucking kidding. Welcome to my 2009.