May 17th, 2011
every day can’t be good / no feeling is final
“Let everything happen to you / Beauty and terror / Just keep going / No feeling is final”
—Rainer Maria Rilke
All my friends got flowers in their eyes / but I got none this season / .. / Waiting for the trains that just never come / Beginning to believe in / the disappearing nature of the people we have been / We have begun to change / into the worst kind of people”
—Counting Crows, High Life
time 2:31 pm feeling down wearing gray shirt, tan skirt, pretty sandals ready for the next phase of my life next app + then cavity drilling and filling + then home
Just keep going.
Again I’m not going to pretend that everything is cool all the time. I do enough of that on Facebook/Twitter, eh. Yes, I have an amazing life blablabla and for that I am extremely grateful (duh) but man. This has been (and will continue to be for the foreseeable future) a tough time in my life. “So it goes.” (—Kurt Vonnegut)
I just need to find a way to muddle through. I just don’t know how.
Anyway. Enough. In an effort to be more positive, a list of great things about my weekend:
-bike ride up to UMN to swim and back! SUPER POSITIVE b/c (a) no gas wasted (b) gorgeous bright sunny weather! (c) lots of physical activity (d) swimming! & with the 50m lanes, no less, love. Possibly the HIGHLIGHT of my weekend.
-trip down ‘memory lane’ with Jeff on Sunday morning. Thank You High School! LOL.
-amazing movie Friday night! It even sold out when we were in line, ha ha. (We went to see Bridesmaids at Jeff’s request.) I now have a newfound respect for and/or obsession with Kristin Wiig.
-prior to that, an amazing dinner at India Palace. Adore!
-superb Yoga Yak yoga session Saturday morning…Thank You Yoga Yak!
-in light of the rainy weather Saturday, pleasant (believe it or not) shopping trip for Totally Unnecessary but Totally Awesome workout top. Thank You Stephie.
-finishing some freelance!
-Jeff, because he is…THE BEST. I mean that in every way!!!
I know there was more but that’s what you get.
I am reading Delusions of Gender and enjoying it. Am I just a huge dork? Maybe? Ha. Now hopefully I can speak more intelligently on the topic of smashing gender bias. Or something.
I was going to make another list of Things I Am Looking Forward To but that just makes me dwell on the future. Not sure that’s where I ought to be?
The story continues. No feeling is final, no feeling is final, no feeling is final…
June 2nd, 2011 at 11:00 pm
What’s been tough? You didn’t talk about the tough time. You just listed the positive things.
June 3rd, 2011 at 7:41 am
Yeah, I know. It’s not all long for this blog, even with its visitor count of, like, 3. I do feel the need to record it though, and then force myself to balance it out with good stuff. More later!