August 24th, 2012
The Great Unease
“Settle down / it’ll all be clear / Don’t pay no mind to the demons / they fill you with fear”
—Phillip Phillips…yes I know
Not Not Not / spacespacespace
The theme of 2011: lowering expectations.
I don’t know that this is good. I think it is not. But regardless, it was achieved, and continues. More on that in a minute.
The theme of 2012: Survival.
So far, so good (if that can be counted as good, I guess).
The first 2/3 of August were pretty fantastic, especially WRT position:relative for August, but also position:absolute for all (CSS TERMS ALERT!). It’s still pretty good but I have been struck by The Great Unease for the past few days, rendering me somewhat useless and always worried.
As usual?
And sleepless.
(But last night was a success. Thank You Air Conditioning/closed windows! I think that is Key.)
Survival. Though it’s shooting pretty low (heh), it’s been immensely helpful to make this THE goal of 2012 (along with attending Jenny’s wedding, which was fabuloso, indeed!). I need that guidance every time I get Off Track. Unfortunately, Survival means limits to what I can do. I’m sorry for that, but I’m not, because this is just How It Must Be. Remembering that helps me to make good choices for ME and not out of obligations to Others or to the Social Life. Hence the Short List, alone time, saying NO, etc. Sorry, casualties. It’s how it must be.
WHATEVER I am sick of this sh*t. So HAPPY FRIDAY!! Today is a wonderful day. Jenny is coming to visit!!! We are going to Hang Out, shop, go to yoga, go out with Liz to a fancy restaurant, and get cherry-chocolate Caribou coolers (if they still have them). YAY! Then Sunday Jeff and I shall attend the fair. DOUBLE YAY! AND I got a free coldpress this AM. From my punch card, from my favorite barista who loves EITS and Florence + The Machine and biking, so is pretty cool. BOOM. SO, in summary, once you get some sleep :), life is good. And when your 2 favorite JJs are around all weekend long, life is VERY good indeed.
AND when you’ve been introduced to the idea of measuring time in milliseconds since 1/1/1970…well then you have a whole other rabbit hole of numbersmania. (Probably not good, but interesting nonetheless.)
(Now if we could just be done with those men [Rethugs] who hate women and want them barefoot and bleeding in the kitchen…that’d be great. F THEM!)
In other exciting news, FFL shall start soon, Macarena is back on the 8th, and Ka-Mei is subbing for her til then. (I had a Nielle nightmare last night.) YAY for good yoga teachers. Also, I got to have tea with Michael. Also, in 3 hours I shall pick up JENNY! HAPPY Friday indeed 🙂
ETA: I realize I did not talk about lowering expectations. Well I guess I didn’t want to! So there. Ha ha.